I wish forgetting you was like cleaning an easy stain on my favourite shirt,
But you don’t stop the affect like a good stain.
You’re more like the dark rectangle on my wall where that photo frame once was:
Impossible to merge with the present.
The dust on the bookshelves reminds me of the beautiful care in you
And so does the empty bed.
You never forget to leave an impression, don’t you?
You always had that style
Ruling over my heart in college too
You stained my soul with love.
Once there, painted all over with colour
Marriage, kids, living together.
People look at me today like a sad old man subject to life’s miseries
But darling I still have that poetry in me you would love.
I still go to Natural’s for a midnight treat but now I order only one scoop,
I wish you were there to finish another
I promise I wouldn’t have complained like I usually did when you were here.
I wish you could come back
Here I am, doing it again,
I told my doctor I wouldn’t wish unreasonable things:
For you to be back and for me to be the same without you.
So, getting to the point.
I’m writing in memory of the lovely girl with whom I aged and faced life.
The girl that showed me how wonderful life can get
Even when it just doesn’t seem to get any better
I’m promising her that I’m going to respect that and learn from it
I’m going to fight depression and stop being a cliché
(We never liked the mainstream anyway.)
My days are still as tinted with you
As they were before.
I still love you and forgive me for talking about trying to remove your stain.
Your stain is in the deepest part of what makes me the person I am.
Your stain is a reminder of beauty-
Impossibly pure beauty- that once garnished my life.
Yes, I have become a romantic as you suspected I would
(Remember when I would laugh at cheesy posts like these? Well, life pays back.)
And I thank you for that.
(I’m still jealous that you got to know what death is like, before I did
And yes, yes, I will stop flirting with the young lady that stays across the road:
I never meant anything serious,
She still misses your morning chai.)
Inspired by the emotions of the main character in the movie ‘Madaari’, for his lost child.